Magnitude 7.8 Earthquake Caused by Massive Fart

FunnyJunk — A magnitude 7.8 earthquake has left thousands injured in FunnyJunk. According to officials, the supersonic boom was man-made.

FunnyJunk residents are distraught as they try to recover what's left of their homes and locate their families.

While earthquakes may be somewhat frequent in FunnyJunk, this was no ordinary earthquake.

Officials say that pure human flatulence is to blame for Sunday's quake. That's right, a massive fart was the cause of this tragedy. City officials have tracked the origin of the blast to home of FunnyJunk resident Fat Ben.

Hundreds of FunnyJunk residents are being treated for asphyxiation, likely from trying to hold their breath.

According to sources close to Ben, the human stinkbomb was attributed largely to a diet that was too rich in fatty food and energy drinks. Ben, nor the FunnyJunk District Attorney's Office could be reached for comment on this matter.

We will keep you updated as more news is released about this terrible tragedy.

Posted at 1:22PM on 05/0